I am cracking myself up at the irony of my last letter and how I was in desperate need of a revamp. Either that or the fact that the only way I can deal with stress is to laugh.... Laugh like no tomorrow.
Well the revamp came. And I think Heavenly Father is now giving me a little taste of my own medicine to see if I am all talk or if I can really apply what I learn.... Cause we really had a good week set up with appointments every minute. And I was pumped. Everybody knows the best part of missionary work is teaching lessons and feeling the spirit 24/7 and reconfirming your testimony and just watching people transform right before your eyes... and then in the course of 5 minutes (not even exaggerating) Every. single. appointment. Fell out. Like what in the world? What just happened? So we took this little revamp attitude and we leaped right over that hurdle and ran like no tomorrow. Talked to everyone. Doored in the rain. And I felt like a real live sacrificing missionary. How much do I love this gospel? That much.
So we are feeling all good and all and even though things aren't going our way we are just turning our challenges into blessings and all and then something big happened. way big.
I am training.
Yes. I thought it was a joke too. Sister Teeples and I got the call on Friday and took one look at our missed calls and my heart skips 5 beats. Gah. But we just go about our day until he finally calls us back and tells Sister Teeples she is training again. Phew. Dodged that bullet. May I talk to Sister Heywood too? Wait what? We are both training? Yep We are both training. Which means Sister Teeples is kicked out and sent off to open a new area and I have to take this one over with a little golden that knows even less than I do and I am supposed to teach her? How is that going to work? Sister Teeples is literally my best friend. I can't do missionary work without her. That would be enough news to rip my heart out much less the fact I have to train.
That made for a very emotional weekend. Not sure if we are just over reacting or what but when I wasn't crying Sister Teeples was and then we would just take turns trying to comfort each other. It was quite a sight I am sure.
Gah. I am freaking out, guys. Freaking out. I am now the one who is supposed to get us everywhere and speak german and manage our time and teach lessons and have relationships with all these people and try to make this whole mission thing a really good experience for my little golden and all? What do I do with Elkin and Ruano? I can't speak Spanish... What about all those times I look to my trainer when I don't know how to say something in German? I literally have never felt this inadequate in my life. I feel like I was already standing on the edge of a diving board right over the deep end totally scared and not wanting to jump and then before I could even think twice the board snaps right underneath my feet. I need my floaties back.
Seriously this is a dream. This can't be real life. I am so nervous and I wish I could just say I have a cure for all these fears yet but I don't. I wrote a list of all my fears for training and then attempted to make a cure list as well...But I didn't get too far... Basically it boiled down to the fact that I am just going to pray my heart out, study the Atonement, maybe eat some chocolate or something and hope for the best.
Here goes nothing.
xoxoxox
s. heywood
Kay just reread my letter and I am being so depressing so I will attempt to cheer you up with some quality pictures...Starting with some more random fruit we found to cheer us up...
I sure will miss her and our quality wind blown look.... sigh.... cross your fingers I get a nice golden.
...and then the call...fyi. this is a great stress reliever positition.
