Okay. The subject really didn't have anything to do with this email.. Except for the fact that I have a craving for Christmas. And elf. And I answered the phone with that this week. Oops.
No worries everyone. I love Germany. It just kept hitting me today how much I love it here. Just living in my cute little German town in my cute little German apartment running from place to place, shouting this message from the rooftops (flashback to my first blog entry about wanting to shout this message from the rooftops and now I am actually doing it! Eep.) all the day long only coming home to grab some grub and sleep for five seconds (or so it feels like) then head out again the next day. Over and over again. Sometimes I forget just how special that truly is. My heart is just overcome with gratitude. I'm too lucky. I will always be so grateful for this experience.
This week has been full of some curve balls and real nail biting experiences. Not anything super big per se. Simply an everyday adventure. I remember someone asking me if this really was the happiest time of your life. And I had to stop and think about it. Really with all the roller coaster of emotions I go through that yall have seen first hand: Sadness. Overwhelming happiness. Rejection. Lifelong friendships. Loneliness. Spiritual highs. Nights of pouring my heart out in prayer. Is it?
Absolutely. 100% yes.
And here's why.
Back in the day when I was a good looking young chap just beginning to shake off my adolescence. Aka: middle school days I think I had this mindset that happiness meant everything was always wonderful. I think that was my expectation when it came to a mission as well. If you are happy all the time. If it's he best 2 years of your life. If it really is so great then everything must go perfectly for you all the time right? Wrong.
"There are many who think [missionaries] rarely experience pain, suffering, or distress. If only that were true. While every [missionary] has experienced an abundant measure of joy each has also drunk deeply from the cup of disappointment, sorrow and loss. The lord in His wisdom does not shield anyone from grief or sadness. But whenever I step into a season of sadness and sorrow I just remember the words: come what may and love it."
Can I tell you a secret? Missionaries are people. Real. Living and breathing people. And sadly that doesn't change when you put on the nametag. Even after doing this day in and day out I am STILL not perfect. I know. Shocked me too. I am having to come down from the clouds a little bit to realize that but it's okay cause I am learning so much from it. Hehe In my scripture reading I have been reading about the personal ministry of Jesus Christ in the Americas. (Or the best part of the whole Book of Mormon. Okay I'm partial. But really.) and something stood out to me this time around: "And there were no envyings, nor strifes, nor tumults... Surely there could not be a happier people among all the people who had been created by the hand of God. But they were in one, the children of Christ. And how blessed were they!"
While teaching this week I thought a lot about that. If we are really children of Christ, how happy we will be. The ultimate happiness. Through thick and thin. We tried to make that more of a focus this week in our lessons. To really have Christ be the center of our lessons. Incredible. No wonder a mission makes you so happy right? You are representing Christ 24/7! What could be better? No matter what storms come our way we will have Christ on our side, we can hold strong and be truly truly happy.
I can not be shaken.
over and out
xoxoxox
s. heywood
