Dear Em,
I am thinking of you tonight. You and every other 12 year old girl. You are not so little anymore and it still blows my mind how I talk to you the same way I do any of my friends. You exude so much confidence and yet there is still that one sliver inside you that I know wants to fit in. Wants to do whatever it takes to be loved and accepted. I have that sliver too. Actually we all do.
You are one of the dearest friends. I have watched how you treasure your relationships. How you will do anything for them even if your own happiness is at risk. I have seen how you will search to make the lonely feel included. I have seen as you laugh with friends and play make believe in the backyard, your genuine love for others. You have the gift of nurturing. I can tell you always want to do what is right. I love going on sister dates with you, eating ice cream for dinner and squealing our way through every chickflick (even if you ditch out on the snuggle parts of the sissy sleepovers) But mostly I love getting a small glimpse of who you really are. I saw your piano teacher at the temple today and she told me how you reminded her of me. That was the biggest compliment because in reality I want to be more like you.
But there is one thing I want to tell you, Emma. And that is this: Keep Shining. We live in a visual world. People are forgetting why they are special. I have seen so many girls get weighed down by the world-- make up, clothes, selfies, and slowly but surely it seems the more of this they have, the less confidence they have. Suddenly being healthy and pretty doesn't feel the same anymore. Instead we start comparing, competing and never feeling like we are enough. We stop treasuring those natural gifts that we have-- the things that make us unique and the things that help us find direction in this world. And we are lost trying to find our value in the mirror rather than those relationships we worked so hard to build. I am learning that this feeling is the most important part of beauty.
How does this beauty feel?
There is nothing wrong with living in a visual world. We can appreciate the beauty around us. You know as much as anyone how much I love taking pictures, coloring, art, the world. The beauty in sunrises, starry nights, fresh air, camping memories, Christmas morning, family laughter-- I am a love of all things pretty. There truly is beauty all around and you and I both are beauty appreciators.
However, how does that beauty feel?
I remember hearing all the cliche phrases like "daughter of a king" or the "beauty from within." How our "price is above rubies" and how we need to be "guardians of virtue." I would roll my eyes thinking "I know I know.. I get it." I am sure you don't do that because you are much better than me... but do you know that? I mean really truly know that? Have you internalized what that truth means? How does that type of beauty feel?
You my dear are not like these people. You are defying society and I can feel it. You have so many gifts and talents that make you, you. One of which is finding true beauty. Feeling true beauty.
Do not let them dim your light. Ever.
All my love
xoxox
Kay
